100th post

That's right kids, this is my 100th post! It hardly seems possible that this blog survived that long! It just proves people will read any old shit on the internet really doesn't it?

I'm going to quickly have a rant because I'm so very fed up with South Eastern Trains - they really are shite. I used to think "oh well, at least they're better than Connex" but this morning I decided they aren't (well, except for the fact that they're not French I suppose).

This morning I was trying to get in to work, it was cold and I really fancied a nice cup of tea (because I'm that rock 'n' roll) and the train was over half an hour late. Then they decided that because it was late they'd stop it before it finished it's advertised route.... Apparently some cock-smoker had jumped in front of a train in London, which is almost a valid excuse, although personally I don't see how it can take half an hour to hose down a train and sweep up a few bits of body.

Anyway, I'm going to stop ranting now, back to my happy place!!! So I'm looking at buying a new laptop, and I've decided to finally take the plunge into the unknown and buy a Mac. Expect a few posts about how that goes sometime in the not-too-distant future....

So, that's basically the 100th post over and done with.

How to destroy unwanted (or wanted) documents

I discovered a new way of destroying office documents today. Forget shredding, I actually made a certificate completely disappear! How? Simple really. Take one laminator, turn up to the hottest setting it has, and feed a document in to the front. Twenty seconds or so later, you have no document. Seriously, the certificate went in the front and nothing came out of the back, it just got smaller and smaller.

It was quite interesting to watch, although the fact it was my only copy of the certificate made it somewhat less amusing than it should have been. Mind you, the people who ran the course will probably laugh their arses off when they see my email requesting a new one on the basis I melted the original.

There is of course one drawback with this method of document destruction – you get through laminators in no time….

[EDIT]

Since I posted this I've managed to have the laminator dismantled and the document retrieved - the laminator is ok but the certificate is somewhat crinkly. I'd upload a photo but the upload's not working - I've probably broken the proxy server now. Ever had one of those days? I'm off down the pub....

Sky high

There was a thing on the news earlier about this glass-bottomed walkway thing the Americans have stuck on the edge of the Grand Canyon. I know the Grand Canyon is one of the seven natural wonders of the world but a glass-bottomed walkway 1,200 metres above nothing? Fuck that! I'm sure the view's amazing but you would not get me on that thing for love nor money.

Obviously I'm a big wuss but I'm sure there are plenty of people out there who couldn't give a shit about looking straight down at over a click of nothing, so I give it a day or two before someone starts charging tourists twenty bucks to walk the loop with their camcorder....

I'm back!

It’s been ages since I posted anything, and for that, I’m sorry. It’s been a busy old time recently, what with week long piss-ups (erm, I mean week long training courses), and gigs and all manner of other shit.

Talking of gigs, Metallica are coming up – tickets on sale tomorrow morning! Seeing as I missed out on seeing Metallica for free last time they were in London I’m going to be doing everything I can to get my grubby little mitts on tickets for this show, especially as it’s at Wembley Arena. Is it just me that thinks the new stadium looks like a giant bear trap? I certainly wouldn’t want to meet the bear that’s for sure…..

Anyway, normal service will be resumed very shortly.